Things You Don't Learn in Sex Ed.

My mother-in-law was putting together a portable heater for us...
Ben: "Grammy, can I help with that? I'm good at screwing things."

Ben stood in front of me holding a small basketball in one hand and a soft soccer ball in the other...
Ben: "Hey Mom, you wanna lick my balls? You know, licking balls helps you get big and strong."

I think a chastity belt is in Ben's future.

Stick It

Ben: "Mom, sometimes I have naked dreams."
Me: "What do you mean, naked dreams?"
Ben: "You know, where everyone is naked and playing."
Me: "OK... what do people do in those dreams?"
Ben: "They just play and share their bodies."
Me: "They share their bodies? What do you mean?"
Ben: "Oh, you know. It's called sticking."